When you live in academic-oriented and exam-oriented society like Hong Kong, getting into college (or university as they call it here) is seen as your first ticket to success. Grades and academic scores on your report cards are glorified and worshiped as a symbol of being one of the best students. Here, exams are a battlefield. Your pen or pencil is your gun, your eraser is your shield and your exam paper is the enemy. We go through harsh training before the big day. After-school tutorials, endless practice papers and mock tests, the same old you-must-get-into-university talks even as far as analyzing and looking at statistics from the past years to “predict” and see the probability or chances of getting a university seat. And for us, non-Chinese students who go to segregated schools with relatively poor facilities, less supportive and understanding teaching staff and limited opportunities, we have to put more effort compared to our Hong Kong Chinese counterparts.
In order to get a seat into university, a student must not only pass the minimum requirement of level 3 in English and Chinese, 2 in Math and Liberal Studies as well as 2 or 3 electives (depends on the program you applied for, they have specific requirements) or if you take M1/M2 (advanced Math) but you have to be better. See, if a university is choosing between Candidate A who only got a pass and Candidate B who flourished with 5** (the highest level), it’s no doubt that Candidate B would be chosen, no matter how talented or how much Candidate A excelled in one subject or in other areas.
But why is it so difficult? That’s because we have about 80,000 students who take the test each year with only about 20,000 degree seats (not including pre-degree or self-finance degrees).
This is our reality.
But of the case of many non-Chinese students (or as we’re called, “ethnic minorities”, though I personally find that label terrible), because most of us go to Designated Schools (DSS which basically means that the majority of the students are from South Asian backgrounds, barely no Hong Kong Chinese students and even if there is, they are separated, not a local school but also not an international school, more like a public international school) where support isn’t relatively that well-off. Some say that it’s our refusal to be immersed into Cantonese (Chinese) learning and how our learning attitudes differ from Hong Kong local students. But I could say the say for International Students (called expats) who have different learning attitudes but International Schools cater to their needs just fine. No, it’s not our refusal nor is it a motivational problem. There is simply just a lack of opportunity for the things that we are good at to be recognized. You’re good in English only? That isn’t enough!
It’s always been because we aren’t good enough compared to our local counterparts. “You’re born and raised in Hong Kong? Then you should be good in Cantonese!” is a sentence I’m truly tired of hearing because one assumes without actually knowing how one lives and without actually asking from the source. Even if we have Chinese as a Second Language classes, it’s only equivalent to a Primary 3 level which in reality, won’t even be seen as “credible”.
So I failed my entrance exam to university.
Actually, that’s not really true—I passed all the minimum requirements for all the subjects except for Math. My overall score is in the higher teens (5* in English, 5 in English Literature, 4 in Liberal Studies, 2 in Biology) which is higher than some of those who passed all) but because I failed to pass my Math and we need a minimum of 5 subjects because we don’t take the Chinese exam, I lost my ticket to a university degree program because I was short of one more point.
It was devastating. Students who don’t get in are usually seen as failures or not good enough. Every year, the top scorers flag the newspaper headlines. True, they deserve the praise but to showcase and hoard them around and call them “the Best Students” because they get sparkling 5**s perpetuates the idea that good scores equals to good students—scores are everything. It’s sickening.
So there I was. An almost-got-in-university student. I settled for an English pre-degree program (also called an associate degree program, not seen as “credible” as your bachelor’s degree program) primarily because that program catered to my need-lessons taught in English, English-speaking classmates and teachers and exemption from Cantonese-taught subjects. Did I want that? I didn’t. But I settled for it.
After two years of my associate degree, I finished it with flying colors. And I’m now about to start my journey as a International Journalism major Year 3 student—the program that I wanted to study since I was a high school freshmen.
Yes, I skipped the first two years of a regular 4-year bachelor’s degree program, thanks to my hardwork during my associate degree. Was I a top student? No. I have Bs and even B-s in my transcript. So, how did I get in? My experience. I was the only student to get into Year 3 entry that doesn’t come from a journalism project before. My journalism experiences came from what I did outside of school. I applied for an internship, out of my own will and got in despite being only an associate degree student. I did freelance writing (including Affinity Magazine!), edit videos, took photos, made a portfolio, participated in social events and got featured in various news outlet for my advocacy when it comes to ethnic minorities in Hong Kong.
During my interview, the professors told me that their then-Year 3 student also did an internship before me and she is a degree student and there I was, just applying to get my degree and I already had a by-line. When I finished my associate degree, it was then that I realized that I was thankful that I failed my Math. Back then, I was determined to show that grades aren’t everything and that just because someone didn’t “succeed” in the traditional way, it doesn’t mean they never well. I am where I am right now because I failed my Math. I was glad I did.
“My teachers didn’t just taught me to get a perfect score, they taught me what it is to be tough. To be prepared for the real world. They allowed me to experience real life things. Things that high school never told me about college. I was lost then. I didn’t know how to be an adult. I don’t know about loans and banks and resumes and jobs and things. But along the way, I found my way. And that’s because of my associate degree.”
Thing is, just because we fail the first time, that doesn’t mean we will always be a failure. Just because we took a different path that others, it doesn’t mean we will never get where we want to go. There is no right path to our success and dreams, as much as society dictates us—we create our own path. Be thankful for failures because you never know where it would lead. It’s not about failing or falling but it’s about getting back up again. As Denzel Washington said, fall forward.
More on my post, “Thankful For My Associate Degree” in my personal blog.
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